blogger Archives ~ Page 2 of 3 ~ Gayle Brown, Author

Oh sure, Cinderella meets her Prince Charming. He’s handsome. He’s charismatic. He’s heroic. He dashes in on his white horse to save the day. But let’s not fool ourselves. In the end, he’s just a man. A typical, ordinary, everyday man.

As the prince and princess are whisked away in the horse drawn carriage and “Happily Ever After” flashes on the screen, real life begins and here’s what you don’t see.

1.He Leaves His Dirty Clothes Laying Around

Prince Charming is a slob. Bet you didn’t know. Well, he is. As soon as he walks through the door from his princely duties, he flings his shoes in the middle of the entryway, tosses his pants on the dining room chair, and he hurls his socks in the middle of the floor. Any floor. The closest floor. Whichever floor fancies him. Cinderella can’t even walk from her bed to her bathroom without stepping on underwear, socks, shirts, pants, whatever article of clothing he has worn since last laundry day.

2. He Leaves the Toilet Seat Up

Yep. Night after night Cinderella sits down to tinkle in her gold plated potty (Even the fairest of princesses have to pee) and SPLASH! Her royal butt lands right in the toilet. After the initial shock of the cold wetness, she curses Prince Charming for not putting the seat back down. I mean, it’s just not that hard (well, the seat itself is…) Put. It. Down. Geesh.

3. He Leaves His Whiskers in the Sink

Yes, of course they have separate sinks in their spacious master bathroom, but it drives Cinderella crazy every time she passes his sink and sees those tiny black specks coating the porcelain. The sink looks like it’s marinating with tiny specs of black pepper. There is a faucet right there. Why can’t he just turn it on and wash the whiskers away?

4. He Leaves the Drawers Open

Although Prince Charming can save the day, he doesn’t have the ability to close a drawer. It’s as if he isn’t strong enough to exert the necessary force to actually push the drawer all the way back in. Perhaps they should invest in those fancy self closing drawers. It may save the marriage someday. Well worth the price.

5. He’s an “Aroundtoit” Guy

No doubt the servants complete the daily maintenance and upkeep of the castle, but there are occasions when Cinderella needs Prince Charming to take care of something. His standard answer is, “I’ll get around to it”. Huh. Amazing how he made finding the glass slipper’s owner a priority. He went right out into the kingdom the very next day. Not a second to waste. But ask him to pick up his clothes? His response: “I’ll get around to it”.

6. He’s Hard of Hearing

When Cinderella and Prince Charming first met he was so into what she had to say. He would listen intently as she complained about her wicked Stepmother and stepsisters. But after the happily ever after? Not so much. How many times has Cinderella had to say the same thing over and over again? Prince Charming claims he doesn’t hear her. Hmmm. Really? Or is it selective hearing? And forgot about when he’s watching the television. No wonder he can’t hear her. The television is so bloody loud. I mean, who needs to watch a polo match at that level? You only need to SEE it, not hear it.

7. He’s Fashionably Challenged

Oh, the good old days when Prince Charming took the time to impress. His pants were crisp and ironed. Nary a wrinkle to be seen anywhere on his outfit. Debonair. Dashing. Suave. Cinderella swooned at the site of her sharped dress man. Today? Striped shirts with plaid shorts. Gym shorts, white undershirt, socks and sandals. Hardly GQ material. Dreadful. No sense of style whatsoever. Clearly, he dressed to impress. Those days are long gone.

8. He Snores. Loudly.

Cinderella has not had a decent night sleep since the credits rolled. Prince Charming snores. Really snores. Shake the walls snoring. She’s tried ear plugs. She’s tried burying her head under the pillow. She flails around hoping to wake Prince Charming up with an “accidental” kick in the shins every now and again. Nothing helps. Nothing works. Absolutely nothing. Well, actually one thing does: She sleeps in one of the 25 guest rooms to get a peaceful nights sleep. Perhaps it’s time for Prince Charming to try a CPAP machine?

9. He’s Gassy

Whether it comes from the upper orifice or the lower one, there a melody of gaseous noises expelled from Prince Charming. Bubbles up or bubbles down, bubbles are coming out of that man one way or another. Although he tries to blame the nasty belching on the butler and the putrid stench on the dog, Cinderella knows better. Clearly, the honeymoon is over.

10. He Has Short Term Memory Loss

Cinderella cannot count the number of times Prince Charming has not been ready for a ball, a wedding, or a coronation because he “forgot” about it. No matter how many times Cinderella informs him of said occasions, Prince Charming never remembers. She sends him messenger birds. She leaves reminder notes next to his sword. She sticks Post It notes on his horse. Yet, he still doesn’t remember. When his wicked mother-in-law arrives on the doorstep, Prince Charming is genuinely shocked to see her. After she has given him the death glare, Cinderella has to whisper sternly under her breath, “I told you like 10 times she was coming”.

Trust me, I know Cinderella isn’t perfect and I am sure there are many of her flaws that Prince Charming didn’t sign up for. But it is real life and I’m sure although they live in a fairy tale, many of us women in real life can totally relate.

It is college acceptance season. Seniors all around the country are eagerly awaiting their acceptance letters. Or, more appropriately, their acceptance emails. Families gather around the computer, waiting in anticipation for that email. Families and seniors alike, filled with anticipation, hoping all their hard work has paid off. A culmination of four years of blood, sweat, and tears. Anxiety. Stress. Pressure. It all comes down to this moment: Will I get into the school of my choice?

I will experience this next year as my son is currently a junior. Since he is my oldest, it is unchartered territory for us. Sure, I went to college. There was a process to follow. Specific criteria. Guidelines. But, it is different today, than it was many moons ago. It is absurd the amount of pressure today’s teenagers are under. Is it too much?

My senior year was a fun-filled year. I didn’t take ALL electives, but I didn’t have to take all AP classes either to get into my school of choice. College admissions are tougher today. They’ve raised their minimum achievement test scores. I assure you, I never would’ve gotten into my school today with the scores I had back then. Some schools require a minimum of 1300 to be accepted. 1300! And that’s for in state schools. Forget about out of state.

Colleges want to see GPA’s of 4.5 or higher. They want well rounded students. Young adults who have contributed to the community. To society. Well rounded teenagers who play sports. Who work. Who belong to club after club. It’s a lot. It really is. I’m not saying we need slackers, but I think the minimum requirements are nuts. And I know not ALL colleges are the same and demand such standards, but a lot of them do.

Personally, I think it’s too much pressure on these young adults. I’m 50 years old and I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up. How can we expect incoming, high school freshmen to declare a major? That’s right. They need to be thinking and deciding as high school freshmen so they can take appropriate classes to prep them for appropriate classes in college. They are 14 years old. 14! How can we expect them to know what they want to do for the rest of their lives at the young age of 14?

And forget about the pressure to take AP classes. If you don’t take AP classes, then you’re told you’re not serious about your studies. At my son’s high school orientation, we were told, “If you don’t take AP classes, then you won’t get into college”. Period. No if’s or but’s. Total intimidation. “You have to be a part of the IB program. The Cambridge Program.” It’s overwhelming. And it’s too much.

When do these kids get to be kids? We are adults far longer than we are kids, and today’s kids are having to grow up too fast. Too much pressure is put on them at too early of an age. They are expected to achieve high levels of excellence at all times. It’s unsustainable. It’s adding to our youth’s anxiety and depression. It’s not the only thing, but it is a contributing factor. We need to ease up just a little. Let teenagers have a social life. Let teenagers be teenagers. Don’t bog them down with hours and hours of homework every night so they can’t do sports or work or volunteer. Don’t make the finish line so far away that they don’t have the endurance to cross it.

Yes, I think teenagers need to learn time management. I think they need to learn how to balance it all. These are life skills and they need to practice them at an early age so they can be successful in the real world. I think they need to be challenged. I think they need to work hard. I am not suggesting we coddle them and give everyone a medal for participating. I am saying we need to provide them with the right balance. We need to give them downtime. We need to provide that balance for them because from what I’ve seen and heard, it no longer exists.

Sprinkle in a pandemic, and forget about it. It’s all that much worse…But what do I know? I’m just a mom to a teenager.

Category: blogger

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Too Much Pressure? Too Much Pressure!