I Know I Am An American

This summer I crossed something off my bucket list: Traveling overseas to Europe. I loved experiencing different countries and different cultures. However, it made me realize how Americanized I really am. Here is why:

I need ice for my drinks. Not a cube, not two cubes, but a whole lot of ice. Doesn’t happen overseas. You get one cube if you’re lucky. Maybe water doesn’t freeze as well overseas?

Don’t panic. Wifi does exist overseas. However, it is the slowest speed I have experienced since wifi was first introduced. My screen was blank while the little wheel kept spinning and spinning while loading and loading. By the time a page loaded, I was moving onto the next spot and would lose the wifi altogether. I feel the need for speed: High speed.

Small Cars/Narrow Roads:
Every car is small. Tiny. Compact. And now I know why. The roads are narrow. Extremely narrow. I would have to sink low in the backseat to avoid watching my drivers weave in and out of streets that could barely fit a bicycle, let alone a car, a car squeezing between cars parked on each side of the road, next to the scooter driving maniacs weaving in between these targets. Pretty sure my Uber rides were Matchbox cars.

Kuddos for overseas being extremely environmentally aware. Truly, I wish we Americans would follow suit. But I sure missed having bags. Relax. They do have bags, but it will cost you. Not sure how they expect us tourists who are buying up all the keychains, magnets, shotglasses, and t shirts to carry, or I should say juggle, such items. Perhaps if I was an octopus I could’ve managed. But I’m not. So I paid for my bags.

What can I say about this one other than I like oblong seats. Round wasn’t such a good fit. And, free toilets. I like free, public toilets. Need to pee? Bring your spare change.

So if you’re traveling overseas in the near future here’s my advice to you:

Be prepared to squeeze into your Matchbox car, which will be driven as if you’re in an extreme racing challenge, as you drink your room temperature beverage, whilst you juggle your purchased goodies, as you rummage through your pockets looking for loose change to use the teeny tiny round toilets.

You’re welcome.

Leave a Reply